Nocturnal lurker.

So Robert Downey Jr. is filming near me and stopped to sign stuff and..

Me: (Holds out dollar bill and pen)
Robert Downey Jr: Are you asking me to deface government property?
Me: 
Me: 
Me: Yes.
RDJ: Gimmee.

Reblogged from mrasayf

Reblogged 11 minutes ago from mrasayf (Originally from hiphenryhop)

97,790 notes

dragonitehugs:

returnerofthesky:

ah

really good

NO NO N NO N O N ON NO NO ON NO NO NONO NOON NON N NOON ONOOOOOO

NINTENDO YOU ARE GOING TO GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK.

Reblogged from j-ellybean

Reblogged 45 minutes ago from j-ellybean (Originally from returnerofthesky)

18,115 notes

One Size Fits All

(A man comes to the counter and places two dresses on the counter: one sized XS and one sized XXL.)
Me: “Are these dresses both for the same woman?”
Customer: “Yes.”
Me: “Oh, okay. These are both very different sizes, so they are not likely to fit the same person. What size does she usually take?”
Customer: “Um… I’m not sure.”
Manager: “Well, does she look more like me or more like her?”
(Note: my manager is quite small, and I am quite big.)
Customer: “Um… uh… I’m sure these will be fine.”
Me: “Sir, because the price is marked down on these dresses they will be Final Sale, so you will not be able to return them if they are not the right size. Are you sure we can’t help you?”
 (The customer looks around furtively, then leans in close so that only my manager and I can hear what he is saying.)
Customer: “These dresses are for me, actually.”
 (My manager looks at me, and I at her, and then she turns to the customer and speaks a very matter of fact voice.)
Manager: “Why don’t you go try them on, then?”
Customer: “Really? Would that be okay with you?”
Manager: “Of course! Let me get you started with a fitting room.”
 (I spend the next hour bringing this man dresses to try on and he had a lovely time! He introduced himself to me and thanked us profusely for being so understanding and helpful. He left with four dresses, all of which fit him to a tee, and he came back regularly after that.)

Reblogged from chrysasaur

Reblogged 55 minutes ago from chrysasaur (Originally from greenandsleepy)

55,283 notes

everyoneknowhequeer:

bryanthephotogeek:

Samantha Bee is a role model.

Damn

(Source: drunkonstephen)

Reblogged from vhplant

Reblogged 57 minutes ago from vhplant (Originally from drunkonstephen)

49,990 notes

(Source: intentandoseringeniero)

Reblogged from vhplant

Reblogged 59 minutes ago from vhplant (Originally from intentandoseringeniero)

8,969 notes

onlyalittlelion:

dduane:

swiggityswagstiel:

drkrislynn:

humanisticscience:

thejunglenook:

scienceisbeauty:

What scientists say in research papers vs. What they actually mean (via io9).

I shouldn’t be laughing this hard.

Yes. This is good.

Omg it’s like my college career staring right at me.

Hey its a chart of Spock-speak

“IT IS SAID” | You’re watching the History Channel.

In lit:
“That’s not my area”: I have no fucking clue
“That’s beyond the scope of my research”: I should know but I still have no fucking clue

onlyalittlelion:

dduane:

swiggityswagstiel:

drkrislynn:

humanisticscience:

thejunglenook:

scienceisbeauty:

What scientists say in research papers vs. What they actually mean (via io9).

I shouldn’t be laughing this hard.

Yes. This is good.

Omg it’s like my college career staring right at me.

Hey its a chart of Spock-speak

“IT IS SAID” | You’re watching the History Channel.

In lit:

“That’s not my area”: I have no fucking clue

“That’s beyond the scope of my research”: I should know but I still have no fucking clue

Reblogged from vhplant

Reblogged 1 hour ago from vhplant (Originally from scienceisbeauty)

5,547 notes

ithinkthereforeiship:

#AND THEN THERE’S THIS ROYAL IDIOT

#history of the british empire

Reblogged from jessilla

Reblogged 1 hour ago from jessilla (Originally from royalpleasure)

193,834 notes

I’M SOBBING

Reblogged from jessilla

Reblogged 1 hour ago from jessilla (Originally from stupidfuckingquestions)

113,662 notes

montypla:

whimmy-bam:

themaraudingdetective:

grapefruitshampoo:

THIS IS THE MOST AMAZING AND BRILLIANT THING EVER

This is what happens when women write ad campaigns for other women *dies from the hotness*

This is making me feel things

hahaha this was hilarious and awesome.

(Source: youtube.com)

Reblogged from jessilla

Reblogged 1 hour ago from jessilla (Originally from grapefruitshampoo)

190,157 notes

Reblogged from jessilla

Reblogged 1 hour ago from jessilla (Originally from leespace)

14,327 notes